I'm not usually one to talk, think, or write about mascara. Gag. Lots of subjects are deeply fascinating. Iguanas, how the Cuban government operates, Venusian storms, or Saturn's for that matter, pomegranate farming, and so on. Mascara is NOT one of them.
Besides, there is not very even footing for discussion. Mediocre mascaras come and go, a good eyeliner is forever.
Preferences vary, as do lashes (curly, straight, sparse...). PLUS it takes at least a week of use in order to assess a mascara properly. The formula needs to be exposed to air, it takes time to dry out to a less goopy consistency, you need to see if it flakes/crumbles/causes allergies... blah di blah.
I've been through the expensive and drugstore ones. Whatever's available, I've tried. (Aside from YSL and Armani mascaras. Just can't bear to fork out my kid's college fund to a bi-monthly mascara habit, ya know.)
The worst one in recent memory was the gaudy gold tube by Guerlain, Le 2. Twas heavily fragranced, burned eyes, causing one to swell up for days so I resembled Quasimodo...
Horrific. I actually mentioned this to some other makeup nerds makeupalley forums, and some people said they had had the same experience. Weighed down my naturally curly lashes till they were completely straight, flaked, the works.
PLUS: Unnecessarily double-sided (two for the price of one? not good when both sides suck), a complete gimmick. BOO GUERLAIN, BOO!!
The best one so far, for me, was the Essence I love extreme volume mascara, about 3 dollars at Shopper's Drug Mart. Under-rated yet it delivers!
Volume, length, the darkest black available (just as black as the super-expensive 'scaras, and far darker than regular drugstore 'carbon black'). Blah di blah. Am on 3rd or 4th tube. Easy to overdo, though.
Coloured mascaras? If you use one that is not pink (ew Hunger Games lady!!), you are awesome.
I remember using a blue mascara in high school, with sparkly gold eyeshadow. Fun fun.
An excellent reasonably priced blue mascara is Quo's, 15 dollars, and lasts ages! They also do a purple one.
Okay now that I've rambled on and on and lost my sole reader (hi sis! how many cupcakes have you feasted on today?), let me get to the FRIGGIN POINT ALREADY.
Having stumbled upon a splendiferous, fantabulous--and other made-up Roald Dahl words--mascara combo I need to share with the InTeRnEtZzZzZ...or die trying. (Typing takes a lot out of you, you know. Risky. Business.)
The combo is....(pens out. notepads ready.)....is....is...(quick inhalation)...
L'Oreal Double Extend Beauty Tubes + Bourjois Liner Effect 'scara!
Do one eye first. Don't want the 'scara to dry in between coats. Otherwise: clumps.
You apply the white side of L'Oreal very fast (it is double sided. but unlike Guerlain, this is not a gimmick). The white side gives GOBS of length. GOBS, I say.
Then apply the black side (again, speed is of the utmost importance). No pause. THEN...the Bourjois just to fill in what you've already done. You can do the bottoms with L'oreals black side if inclined to.
Whew. Done. Fast. Heart racing. Clock ticking...
Move onto the next eye. Quick! Breathing is for amateurs! Hurry scurry little mouse...
Then collapse in a heap and await the ambulances.
Reasons why this amazing combo rocks:
~requires two reasonably priced mascaras, so it's like you're paying for a high-end scara, but with way better results.
~you can often find both of these mascaras on sale, or use a coupon. Or, you know, SDM points if you're lucky enough to be a Canuck.
~no flaking. long-lasting. you can use on bottom lashes and needn't fear charcoal smudges.
~literally: a false lash effect. The kind promised in doctored, photoshopped ads. Sans lash infills as with Penelope Cruz and Rai, Rai, Rai.
Length. Volume. Black. Perfect separation.
~easy to remove. No watery eyes and burning mascara remover required. Just warm water and a teensy bit of rubbing. BECAUSE THE L'OREAL DOUBLE EXTEND BEAUTY TUBES (L.D.E.B.T.) IS A TUBING 'SCARA! Different to a normal 'scara. Other tubing 'scaras include Lise Watier 24 Hours mascara, Clinique Lash Power, MAC Opulash, Blinc, etc.
One might go so far as to suggest this same effect can be achieved with any combination of tubing mascara+separating mascara. One might be right.
Me? Staying loyal to this combo till the devil possesses me. Or till the next mascara drives by, winking, in a flashy car and a flurry of hype.
I don't care to use an eyelash curler, by the way. SO SUE ME, PENELOPE. SUE. ME. (please don't, though. your lawyer's a fiend, I've heard.)
The End
APPLAUSE.
Credits:
L'Oreal Double Extend Booty Toobz
Quasimodo, aka artist's rendition of the author of this marvelous piece
Penelope Cruz
Aishwarya Rai
A lawyer (Penelope's, je think)
Besides, there is not very even footing for discussion. Mediocre mascaras come and go, a good eyeliner is forever.
Preferences vary, as do lashes (curly, straight, sparse...). PLUS it takes at least a week of use in order to assess a mascara properly. The formula needs to be exposed to air, it takes time to dry out to a less goopy consistency, you need to see if it flakes/crumbles/causes allergies... blah di blah.
I've been through the expensive and drugstore ones. Whatever's available, I've tried. (Aside from YSL and Armani mascaras. Just can't bear to fork out my kid's college fund to a bi-monthly mascara habit, ya know.)
The worst one in recent memory was the gaudy gold tube by Guerlain, Le 2. Twas heavily fragranced, burned eyes, causing one to swell up for days so I resembled Quasimodo...
Horrific. I actually mentioned this to
PLUS: Unnecessarily double-sided (two for the price of one? not good when both sides suck), a complete gimmick. BOO GUERLAIN, BOO!!
The best one so far, for me, was the Essence I love extreme volume mascara, about 3 dollars at Shopper's Drug Mart. Under-rated yet it delivers!
Volume, length, the darkest black available (just as black as the super-expensive 'scaras, and far darker than regular drugstore 'carbon black'). Blah di blah. Am on 3rd or 4th tube. Easy to overdo, though.
Coloured mascaras? If you use one that is not pink (ew Hunger Games lady!!), you are awesome.
I remember using a blue mascara in high school, with sparkly gold eyeshadow. Fun fun.
An excellent reasonably priced blue mascara is Quo's, 15 dollars, and lasts ages! They also do a purple one.
Okay now that I've rambled on and on and lost my sole reader (hi sis! how many cupcakes have you feasted on today?), let me get to the FRIGGIN POINT ALREADY.
Having stumbled upon a splendiferous, fantabulous--and other made-up Roald Dahl words--mascara combo I need to share with the InTeRnEtZzZzZ...or die trying. (Typing takes a lot out of you, you know. Risky. Business.)
The combo is....(pens out. notepads ready.)....is....is...(quick inhalation)...
L'Oreal Double Extend Beauty Tubes + Bourjois Liner Effect 'scara!
Do one eye first. Don't want the 'scara to dry in between coats. Otherwise: clumps.
You apply the white side of L'Oreal very fast (it is double sided. but unlike Guerlain, this is not a gimmick). The white side gives GOBS of length. GOBS, I say.
Then apply the black side (again, speed is of the utmost importance). No pause. THEN...the Bourjois just to fill in what you've already done. You can do the bottoms with L'oreals black side if inclined to.
Whew. Done. Fast. Heart racing. Clock ticking...
Move onto the next eye. Quick! Breathing is for amateurs! Hurry scurry little mouse...
Then collapse in a heap and await the ambulances.
Reasons why this amazing combo rocks:
~requires two reasonably priced mascaras, so it's like you're paying for a high-end scara, but with way better results.
~you can often find both of these mascaras on sale, or use a coupon. Or, you know, SDM points if you're lucky enough to be a Canuck.
~no flaking. long-lasting. you can use on bottom lashes and needn't fear charcoal smudges.
~literally: a false lash effect. The kind promised in doctored, photoshopped ads. Sans lash infills as with Penelope Cruz and Rai, Rai, Rai.
Length. Volume. Black. Perfect separation.
~easy to remove. No watery eyes and burning mascara remover required. Just warm water and a teensy bit of rubbing. BECAUSE THE L'OREAL DOUBLE EXTEND BEAUTY TUBES (L.D.E.B.T.) IS A TUBING 'SCARA! Different to a normal 'scara. Other tubing 'scaras include Lise Watier 24 Hours mascara, Clinique Lash Power, MAC Opulash, Blinc, etc.
One might go so far as to suggest this same effect can be achieved with any combination of tubing mascara+separating mascara. One might be right.
Me? Staying loyal to this combo till the devil possesses me. Or till the next mascara drives by, winking, in a flashy car and a flurry of hype.
I don't care to use an eyelash curler, by the way. SO SUE ME, PENELOPE. SUE. ME. (please don't, though. your lawyer's a fiend, I've heard.)
The End
APPLAUSE.
Credits:
Bourjois Liner Effect 
Quasimodo, aka artist's rendition of the author of this marvelous piece
Penelope Cruz
Aishwarya Rai
A lawyer (Penelope's, je think)
No comments:
Post a Comment